I’m learning that ALL of my issues derive from destructive core beliefs and I've been learning how to destroy them because I've realized that I have the power to reconstruct new healthy core beliefs.
Everyone encounter with another human being is an opportunity to see where our core beliefs stand.
Every human being is a mirror for us and if we are willing to dig into the reactions that other people bring out of us, those moments can become incredible opportunities of growth and development for ourselves.
Every situation, every conversation, every challenge, OUR ENTIRE HUMAN EXPERIENCE, is meant to push us into who we truly are.
That being said, we tend to get distracted from that truth and that’s when we get tangled up in life instead of doing the work that it takes to comb through it all.
I’ve gotten tangled up in life so many times. I got tangled up so bad last month. This is why I’m writing this. I completely understand what it’s like to allow myself to get caught up in life instead of learning from it and using all that it gives me for my benefit.
It’s a truth that never changes. Everything in life points us to the areas within ourselves that need our attention.
Oprah says, “Life doesn’t happen TO you, life happens FOR you.”
Now more than ever before, I am actively doing the inner work that gives me the ability to perceive EVERYTHING as something that is shaping me, instead of getting caught up in it.
How do we avoid getting tangled up in life?
I’ll tell you what’s been working for me: getting serious about meditation. Not just 3 or 5 minutes but a significant amount of time. 15-20 minutes at least, to begin with and the more, the better. I’ve talked about meditation before but I wasn’t taking it as serious as I do now. In the past, I meditated for a short amount of time, for a few days a week and it didn’t do much for me. It was nice but I did not experience the transformations that I am now experiencing with my daily meditation practices.
The truth is that consistency will always give birth to something. In this case, meditating daily for a significant amount of time gives me the ability to PAUSE. Not only in that moment while I am mediating but all throughout the day. I am able to pause, collect myself and respond to what I am experiencing instead of react to it.
This is the key to deconstructing destructive core beliefs and reconstructing healthy core beliefs.
We need to pause so the waves of our minds can calm down. Then we'll be able to see what's on the bottom of the ocean floor.
Oh, I needed to pause. Big time.
I used to meditate with this attitude: "Ok let me get this meditation over with so I could start my day." But now, I meditate with the deep understanding that it is a fundamental part of my mental wellness and I cannot live a quality life without this practice.
I needed to pause in order to separate myself from my feelings. I am not my feelings. I am the manager. I feel them but I am not defined by them. But without taking the time to pause, I get distracted by how powerful the feelings feel and I fall deep into them.
This manager was tired! But it was because I wasn’t taking a long enough pause each day and because I was rushing through it.
Life Coach, Priscila Mercedes, explains that we should not attach ourselves to our feelings when we describe them. It’s better to refer to our state of being in terms of energy. For example, “I could sense that my energy is lower than last week. What happened?” Our feelings are the messengers, they communicate to us that our energy has shifted and they try to get our attention. It is incorrect to say, "I am sad." I am not sadness. Even if we feel sadness, that is not what we are or what we will ever be. That feeling of sadness is an alarm, it is not who we are. We are God’s creation. Therefore, we are complete. Our upbringing, childhoods, traumas, etc, have distorted that sense of wholeness within us. That completeness. Destructive core beliefs are a huge part of that distortion.
I am not my destructive core beliefs, neither are you. But we must deconstruct them so they don't lead the way. And the only way to begin that process is to gain more awareness and we gain that awareness with meditation. That’s the first practical step.
I’ve been meditating consistently for two weeks and I’m beginning to see my current destructive core beliefs show up behind things that I do or say or think, even in the way I eat or the way I use my time. They are a driving force that must be faced.
The awesome thing is that we have the power to transform them!
It’s fascinating to notice these destructive core beliefs play out in my behavioral patterns that I’ve been used to doing for many years. To face them, question them, correct them, transform them, is challenging but ultimately, it is so rewarding. This is what doing the inner work consists of and I promise myself to continue doing the work so I don’t get so tangled up ever again.
I am capable of doing all of the inner work that I need to do in order to return to my truest complete self.
You are capable of doing all of the inner work that you need to do in order to return to your truest complete self.
The point is: Meditation.
Consistent intentional daily meditation, realizing it's urgent importance and it's wondrous benefit to our lives.
That's step one. We'll get into step two next week!
One day at a time my friends. We got this.
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