You may not be struggling with depression but maybe someone you know is having a challenging time. On this week’s blog I want to share some practical tips.
#1 THERE IS POWER IN EXPRESSION - FIND SOMEONE TO EXPRESS YOURSELF TO
If you’re struggling with depressive thoughts it is tempting to seclude yourself completely and not speak to anyone. Your ego can trick you into thinking that you do not need help but do not allow your ego to deceive you. Ask for help, open up to someone you trust and express the pain that you’re feeling inside. Do not keep that pain inside of you because it will kill you. Speak up. If you do not have anyone in your life to talk to, there are many phone numbers that you can find on google with people that you can speak to and they are available 24/7.
If there is someone in your life that you think may be struggling with depression, ask yourself if you are able or willing to listen to them. You should be prepared to create a space for them that isn’t judgmental. They may not need you to come up with a quick solution for them. They may just need you to listen and to love them. If you believe that you are prepared to hold a space for your loved one, ask them how they are feeling and let them know that they are safe and cared for by you.
#2 THERE IS POWER IN ACCEPTANCE - DO NOT PUNISH YOURSELF FOR HOW YOU ARE FEELING
If you’re feeling low, it feels like you’ve been defeated, like you’ve lost a battle and all is lost. Hopelessness is the worst feeling you could feel. There’s no need to punish yourself further. These are the moments in which you need to give yourself some compassion. Treat yourself like you would treat someone that you’re madly in love with. Have some patience and allow yourself to sleep in late for a few days if you can. Treat yourself with some extra dark chocolate if you can. Take some time to escape by watching one of your favorite old movies. Accept this low moment and give yourself some time. Try again tomorrow and the next day and the next but if you’re not feeling good right now, you don’t have to force it. Accept the present moment and breathe.
If there is someone in your life who is currently at a low place, please do not kick them when they’re down. Don’t call them names. This is not the time for tough love. This is the time for empathy and understanding. Let them know that you care. Send them good energy and pray for them. The best thing you can do is let them know how much you love them.
#3 THERE IS POWER IN HOPE - MAKE SHORT TERM PLANS
If you’re feeling low, if you’re going through a challenging time and depression is kicking your butt, you probably feel hopeless. I believe that the most dangerous thing you could lose is hope. It’s a dark place to be in. You can’t see anything at all and being alive is exhausting at this point. Making short term plans can help. It could be as simple as this: Today I will get out of bed, eat something that’s good for me and do one thing that my future self will thank me for and that could be a workout or your job or using your creativity, etc. Give yourself something to look forward to. It could be as simple as buying yourself some ice-cream this weekend to celebrate the fact that you’re still here and fighting the good fight. Make a plan to drive somewhere nice or make a plan to take yourself out on a date. Make a short term plan that isn't impossible to execute in this season.
If there is someone you love that is currently secluded and unusually quiet, ask them if they would like to take a walk in the park or ask them if they would like to have lunch with you or have a conversation with some hot tea and some good snacks. They may refuse at first but after you give them some time, ask them again. It is not your responsibility to bring them into a better place but if this person is dear to your heart, please make sure they have the help that they need, even if it’s not you. Reach out to a professional, search for resources, read articles and pray for wisdom.
FINAL THOUGHTS:
If you’re dealing with depression or if you’re dealing with a loved one who is currently struggling with depression, I want you to know that you are not alone in this. There are so many people who experience this. I have read many articles and I have heard many testimonies of people who have struggled and some who continue to battle this depressive state of mind. I’m someone who faces these lows as well and I refuse to completely let go of hope. It has gotten dark but I cannot let go and neither can you my friend.
And one last thing: You are not your thoughts. You are not defined by depression. It may pass through your soul but it is not a permanent member of your household. It may knock you out, leaving you unconscious for a few weeks but once you regain consciousness, you get to decide who you’re going to be.
I’ve been knocked out plenty of times and I still get knocked out sometimes but I’m still going to make music and write and dance and audition and go after my dreams. For as long as I’m alive, I’ll find a way to crawl back up off the ground, as hard as it may be, I will. It may take a few weeks but I’ll always come back and so will you.
One day at a time.
We got this.
One day at a time.
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